Glad to hear you decided to give it another try. A blog is a diary of sorts or it can be used to share feelings, thoughts or whatever. How you use it is up to you.

That said, why should we be bored reading what you have to say? If we didnt''want to read, then we don't have to. But, if we choose to do so, then apparently it's because we're interested. That being said, our reading it is just another way that we can get to know you better. I don't see a problem with that.

As for being tired, please take it a bit easier. Learn that much from my experience. Your being tired is just your body's way of saying it's tired and needs to slow down a bit. Listen to it. You'll never have that strength and energy you had when you were 30. You need to kind of reserve what you have now. You have a long life ahead of you.

You have touched so many people by your being in their lives, mine included. Sure we had our differences, but the fact that we've been able to overcome them says a lot.

I know I would enjoy reading what you have to say. So, please keep posting. I feel I do get to know you a bit better when you do. I believe a lot here are very interested in what you have to say and what makes you the person you are.

I don't think you really even realize just how much you have accomplished and just how many lives you touched and how many people you have helped along the path of your life. Most don't until it's too late. Without your part in all of this, none of us would even be here, nor would this place exist. You were the catalyst that brought of us here. So, keep on being the person you are and we will keep on reading what you have to say.

Ditto! Couldn't agree more.
In spite of anything or everything in my lifetime, obstacles, challenges, the disappointments, and all that is good, tremendous blessings, how I know there is room for improvement and the realization of knowing I can always do just a bit better or even a lot better, I'm still glad I am "me".
Everything has it's time.

First of all: TM, you need to rest. You did a LOT over the past few months. This is obvious by the amount of time you were away from here. TM, you need to rest. As we get older, our bodies need more and more recuperation time. TM, you need to rest. Yes, I said it three times on purpose. Why? I'm worried about you, Friend. As time goes by, we all can't help but get older, and we all have to remind each other to REST!! TM, I don't know what I would do if anything ever happened to you. Let alone your family and how much THEY need you. I know you do what you do, to take care of them, but please remember to take care of yourself...because without you...what would they do? YOU are the most important factor in your freinds and families' lives. And you need to remember to baby and protect that most important asset: YOU.

PLEASE. Slow down a little..

Luv,
My

I think this morning is a good time for me to share a little something. I have a personality flaw. Some see it as being a control freak but I would disagree. A control freak wants to control everything and every one, I'm not trying to control anyone else's actions. I think it is more a case of being an anti-control freak. I don't like to be controlled. Generally people try to control others through manipulation. You can't just come out and tell someone to do something so you try to manipulate events and people to push someone towards doing or not doing that thing that you wanted in the first place. I've had this flaw as long as I can remember. And I've fought with it just as long. I went to a basketball game in Junior high one time and didn't wear any socks, it was the cool thing to do at the time, anyway as I'm going into the game the Principle pulls me aside and informs me that I can't go in like that. Like THAT ???, like I'm naked or something. He was trying to control me in an area that in my mind didn't concern him, wasn't doing any harm to anyone and shouldn't have been an issue. I have come to the realization that some others do have a right to make rules that I have to go by if I want to be involved in their activity, but that's another story. This particular time I reacted much as I still do unfortunately, when pushed I push back harder. That night I calmly turned around at the door and went outside where I removed my shoes as well and headed back to the game completely barefoot. Yes I knew what was coming but I had no idea how intense things would get. Do you know that before it as over that Principle actually drew back his arm and made a fist ? He was on the verge of punching this kid who had shown blatant disrespect for him and his rules.

So yes, I have a personality flaw at least in some eyes. I have never learned to just let it go, let it slide on by. Do what they want you to do how they want you to do it and everyone will be happy. But it ain't so. The controllers or manipulators may be happy but the person being manipulated isn't.

So pray for me but not too much, I have no intention of becoming that person who never questions authority or who lets others push me into the box they want me to fit in. I will always be the one who, if given crap over nothing will return that crap two fold. The whole " I don't like this so you need to change" thing just doesn't work for me.

That's it for now. a little rambling but I hope I got across what I wanted to say. Maybe tomorrow I will touch on people who say things in a conversation that are obviously meant to convey much more than the simple message they are giving.

What a wonderful day. I'm considering bankruptcy, I've got the IRS up my ass, I've got contractors billing me for thousands because I put in a labor order that the client isn't paying for and my own forum is no longer a retreat from the world because of a stupid freaking pig avatar.

Hope your day is going better.

Sounds like you've got a royal ration of poop. I'm sorry you do. I hate it when people don't pay for their work that's been done...is there any way you can get paid up front?

TM, I'm really sorry that you're having all these problems. Your Island is still and always will be your refuge. I never should have divulged that, or why, I didn't like your pig avatar. In the scheme of things, it's really not that important. I apologize for making such a big deal out of. Please, put it back up and scare the hell out of me with it, for Halloween. Luv you, Freind, and everything is and will be ok on the Island front. Disagreements, or no, you are surrounded by people who love you and would do anything to make you feel better. You have given us this Island. We can argue with you so much, but when it comes down to it, you have given us all so much. And if any of us forget that from time to time...we always remember it again.

TM. you're a fighter. Just hang tough. I know it seems impossible, but hopefully things will work out for you. Dealing with the IRS is scary, but you can work thing out with them. Good Luck.

What is funny, is that no matter what life throws at us, we still have the power to fight against it and win. Just remember that God has a plan and it will come to light in time and that you aren't alone in what you're going through.

I'll be fine, I'm always fine. I was in a mood anyway and I was feeling pushed over something that I felt like wasn't necessary. So I vented.

This blog thing could be fairly dangerous for me because I just may let go with things at times that I otherwise wouldn't. Not always a good thing.

You're right CT, I am a fighter. Nothing in my life would be the same if I wasn't. I have fought for everything I've ever achieved and have no plans of letting up. I don't like feeling forced at all. And I will use every means at my disposal to push back. I'm not going to put the pig back up even though I like him. He is the epitome of how I feel about a lot of different issues. He has a very simple message, " Don't mess with the pig." And believe it or not, my posting him really has nothing to do with anything in the past. It has to do with my feelings today and probably tomorrow.

TM wrote:

This blog thing could be fairly dangerous for me because I just may let go with things at times that I otherwise wouldn't. Not always a good thing..

However, it's good to let off steam, so I would say it can be very therapeutic.

True CT but where does being therapeutic for me begin to be detrimental to someone else ? I just need to temper my post if not my thoughts.

Hang in there, it's always darkest before the dawn.

Thanks MIA, I know the tide will turn. Hey instead of being Missing in Action, why don't you come on in and be found.

What TM said!

ditto

WOT? Who is MIA? Am I losing my mind?

TM wrote:

True CT but where does being therapeutic for me begin to be detrimental to someone else ? I just need to temper my post if not my thoughts.

How would it be detrimental to others? A blog is your thoughts. No one else is forced t read it, so no one should be upset by anything you say. It's really no different than if you were talking to someone and had an opposing view. Also, you do have it open to allow people to post to it.

TM wrote:

I think this morning is a good time for me to share a little something. I have a personality flaw. Some see it as being a control freak but I would disagree. A control freak wants to control everything and every one, I'm not trying to control anyone else's actions. I think it is more a case of being an anti-control freak. I don't like to be controlled. Generally people try to control others through manipulation.

Mercy, I just got to this catching up while I was gone. Hey buddy! Who among us doe NOT have some kind of personality flaw, especially in the eyes of others? My God, none of us can possibly behave 100% of the time to the liking or expectations of others, let alone what we often foolishly expect of our own selves at times. It's been my experience those calling others "control freaks" very often have issues and weaknesses which allows them to let and even want someone else to take control of them or simply use it as an excuse to blame someone else for their own shortcomings. Most of the time those who are controlled by others and allow it want it to be that way because they are either incapable or unwilling to properly control their own behavior. True there are some real jerks among us who think they know it all and have some need to control others, but like you say they are generally the master manipulaters and choose their prey very carefully. I think that is because they really aren't worth a damn themselves so they hunt out the weak to build themselves up and are just plain chicken bullies. You are not like this at all and I'm not just blowing smoke. I've known you from forums for years before ever comning to the Island and if I had a sense you were anything like that I sure would not be here. Speak your mind, you do, give your honest opinion you do, and as Mr. S says of himself "I call a spade a spade as I see it" and people respect that.

You can't just come out and tell someone to do something so you try to manipulate events and people to push someone towards doing or not doing that thing that you wanted in the first place. I've had this flaw as long as I can remember. And I've fought with it just as long. I went to a basketball game in Junior high one time and didn't wear any socks, it was the cool thing to do at the time, anyway as I'm going into the game the Principle pulls me aside and informs me that I can't go in like that. Like THAT ???, like I'm naked or something. He was trying to control me in an area that in my mind didn't concern him, wasn't doing any harm to anyone and shouldn't have been an issue. I have come to the realization that some others do have a right to make rules that I have to go by if I want to be involved in their activity, but that's another story. This particular time I reacted much as I still do unfortunately, when pushed I push back harder. That night I calmly turned around at the door and went outside where I removed my shoes as well and headed back to the game completely barefoot. Yes I knew what was coming but I had no idea how intense things would get. Do you know that before it as over that Principle actually drew back his arm and made a fist ? He was on the verge of punching this kid who had shown blatant disrespect for him and his rules.

That's not a "flaw", TM, that's being a kid. A stubborn kid, I admit, but what healthy kid doesn't at least try to fight off authority at one time or another? Boys will often do it just the way you did and I think very often it's about wanting to hide some hurt so deep they don't know any way to express it, get rid of it, deal with it and it's an unconscious call for attention and help in an effort to push it aside replacing it with an attitude. Sometimes I think it's because they want to hide it too. Jr. High School age frame is tough for most kids and that is when a really good coach would recognize this, put his arm around you and show some compassion in hopes of bringing what really is the problem to the surface and help you deal with it. But, don't even get me started on coaches.

So yes, I have a personality flaw at least in some eyes. I have never learned to just let it go, let it slide on by. Do what they want you to do how they want you to do it and everyone will be happy. But it ain't so. The controllers or manipulators may be happy but the person being manipulated isn't.

Manipulators are NOT happy either, TM. If they truly were they wouldn't be manipulators. There would be no need for it. Think about it! They are nothing more than clever bullies. At least they think they are clever and yeah sometimes it works for them, but just imagine how much work it is for them to plan it all out so it works. What a waste of one's brains and talent.


So pray for me but not too much, I have no intention of becoming that person who never questions authority or who lets others push me into the box they want me to fit in. I will always be the one who, if given crap over nothing will return that crap two fold. The whole " I don't like this so you need to change" thing just doesn't work for me.

How does one pray for another "too much"?
No one should feel pressured or intimidated when questioning authority if it's done in a polite fashion respectfully. It is hard to walk away when "given crap over nothing" if one is worth their salt, I agree but, payback isn't pretty either. I think we all feel at times we have no need or desire to change. I'm not great at that either if pushed, but I do try to listen, think about it and the ramifications of not being open to it is not good. If you have thought out all angles from those you ordinarily respect and want to have a relationship with that works who are telling or hopefully asking you consider making some changes it deserves a great deal of thought before an outright "no", I will not do it.
It's impossible for us to know how others see or perceive us, we are not them with their mind sets, backgrounds, life experiences and can't possibley know what they personally may be dealing with. Sometimes it's hard to put ourselves into what their situation may be and the perspective they are coming from and often make misjudgments because of that. That's just common sense and life as we know it unless we choose to totally isolate ourselves from those who don't seem to march to the same tune we do.
All of us need to call on our patience more often.

That's it for now. a little rambling but I hope I got across what I wanted to say. Maybe tomorrow I will touch on people who say things in a conversation that are obviously meant to convey much more than the simple message they are giving.

I look forward to this!

My lid is closed.

Thanks Sunny, You said that perfectly.

Sunny, have I told you lately that I love you ?

She is a very special lady alright